KIMBERLEY DENNEY: Finally. Justice for Alligator Killer

Commentary by
Kimberley Denney

Tim Goll makes me sick.

But lest I sound prejudicial, so
do Jordan Milo, Theo Derleth,
and John Brice Langford. They
all inspire violent illness, in that
their actions make me want
to vomit, then shoot out their
eyeballs and beat them with
a baseball bat. I do believe in
justice, eye for an eye style.
Remember these jerkoffs?

In March 2006, they shot and
killed a Florida gator at Blue
Hole in the Key Deer National
Refuge. Wait, that makes
it sound almost accidental.

Sterile. Kid stuff. What they
did was bring out their shiny
high-powered .357 pellet rifles
and set off to Blue Hole with the
intent of catchin’ them a 400-
pound gator. Really impress
the chicks. This would surely
get them laid.

Derleth was the lookout.

Goll and Milo shot and killed
some native birds to use as
bait to lure the gator out of the
lake, making it an easy target.
Then they shot out its eyes
with a pellet rifle (Goll claims
his rifle was not high powered
enough to kill. I mean, the guy
is practically innocent.), and
used a baseball bat to murder
her. The gator was a she, and she
had a male mate at the refuge.

Refuge. Ha!

She was taken to a shed,
“dressed,” friends were called,
and she was served at a bbq at
Milo’s home. Where his family
lives. And, according to witnesses,
members of the family
attended the bbq.

Who said there’s nothing
for kids to do in the Keys?
These Rhodes scholar
candidates took photos of
themselves with the gator and
a rifle and posted them on
Milo’s MySpace page. Derleth
and Langford bragged about
the murder at their high school.
And that’s how you incriminate
yourself, folks.

Long story short, Derleth
and Langford (who was
a juvenile at the time) were
sentenced to pre-trial intervention.
Now that’s kid stuff. Like there is no research whatsoever
that supports a link between
juveniles who abuse, torture or
kill animals and then go on to
rape and/or murder humans.

Goll and Milo finally, and I
mean FINALLY, pleaded guilty
in June 2007 to felony alligator
poaching. What do you think
they got? C’mon, you remember,
the harsh punishment of . . . five
years’ probation.

Yep. That was it. Stalking,
murdering, and mutilating
equals probation. Six months in
the county clink. Pay $50 a month
for supervision. Live without
violating the law. Don’t use
intoxicants “to excess” or possess
drugs or narcotics. Do eight
hours of public service a month
for the first three years— hold
onto your camouflage caps
here— half of which must involve
the care of animals or the
environment.

That’s not a ticking time
bomb. But it would have gone
hand in hand with the mandatory
psychiatric evaluation and
treatment. Except that Goll
couldn’t seem to make it to
those appointments. What is he,
psycho? Ah, yeah.

Also, Goll hasn’t been able
to abide by another little term
of probation, the one involving
not using illegal drugs. And he
hasn’t violated probation once.
Not a once. Just twice.

So, in April 2008, he was
cited for probation violation
for failing to see his therapist,
failing to pay $50 a month for
his supervision, and testing
positive for cocaine and THC
(marijuana). His punishment?
Judge Mark Jones restored the
original terms of probation with
after-care follow-up, and the
special condition of 364 days
in Monroe County Jail. He got
credit for time served and had to
complete an in-house program
at the jail.

This did a world of good,
because in February 2009 he
violated probation again. Failure
to pay $50 per month. And,
oh yeah, the drugs. This time
he tested positive for cocaine,
THC and Benzodiazepines (the
dictionary.com search for this
term brings up lots of Xanax
ads). What’s hilarious is that
this time the drugs kicked in and
he denied that he even violated
probation.

But wait, we are about to
witness a true miracle. Hallefuckinglujah!

A new judge on
the case who finally sees this guy
for who he really is: A VIOLENT
CRIMINAL OFFENDER. This
month, Judge David Audlin
sentenced Goll to 36 months in
a state prison!!! He gets credit for
the 348 days he’s already served
in Monroe County Jail, but that
still leaves him 747 days left to
think about his crime, plot the next one, and turn Kool-Aid,
fruit and moldy bread into
prison hooch.

This is a true victory for
animal rights advocates, and
hopefully sets a precedent. If
anything, it will surely please
the writers of the numerous
letters in Goll’s criminal file,
from California to Michigan
to Massachusetts, all imploring
that he be sentenced to the
maximum five years in prison
and a $1,000 fine.

A million thanks, Judge
Audlin, for giving him the muchneeded
and long-awaited kick
in the ass he so wholeheartedly
deserves. And if there is a god,
that’s just the beginning of the
pain in his ass now that he’s in
prison. Suey!

Go Back Where You Were